Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Why would I want to date Ann Coulter?

So many things wrong with that. I mean I know she has a penis but I doubt I'd want to touch it. (score one for suggesting 'strong' women are actually men! >.<) Point is, I'm gay, and evidently liberal, also ostensibly frontal-lobe capable, so it's an absurd suggestion. And yet some ad-bot seems to think otherwise.

Clearly, she's in a fairly weak disguise on the right. 
As I was browsing and replying to some hot guys on OKcupid, the adslot on the right was trying to hook me up with some hot local singles! Except they were girls. (Clearly, the adbot is under Coulter's influence!) I wasn't really paying any attention (as is often the case with anything that has boobs) until one face caught my eye--Coulter badly disguised as a glossy lipped, dark haired harlot!!

Supposedly these adbots are supposed to stalk your interests and deliver enticingly relevant goodies you can't help but click. Right? So while I suppose it's on track with offering me hot singles, it's way off by offering me ladies. Do not want.

So where are the hot buff sexy guys who want to hook up with me, hm??


I think the easy answer (besides the adbot's having been made with very cheap parts) is roughly something like the Mac-virus scenario. It used to be, at least, that one of the reasons people recommended Macs was they were supposedly virus-proof. But that was less to do with design cleverness (hackers are cleverer) as market share. Because Mac users were such a minority, it wasn't time-effective to develop a virus to attack the that OS when you could do so much more damage by simply targeting Windows.

Similarly--I'm a gay. And awesome as that is, I'm a minority. A really awesome minority, of course, but we'll put that aside for now. Given the nature of guys, ads like the one hounding me with local hotties are probably fairly effective on dating sites like OKcupid. However, as breeders make up about 90%, it's just easier for these cheap-ass adbots to put up ads with female hotties as they can capture the vast majority with one ad rather than spend resources to develop a second one to target a (totally super awesome) minority.

As I said, these adbots are made with really cheap parts. It might not even be that costly to have a gay-version, but it's still too costly for internet advertising. Think about how many times you have ever actually clicked one of those things. They gotta make a profit somehow--and the cheaper their production costs, the more money they can eek out in returns on the campaign.

I still want to see the hot local boy-hotties looking to hook up with me/meet me. Sure, I know it's a total fabrication, but it'd be nice to pretend, nyeh? At the least, it'd be better than having a Jersey-Shore Coulter staring out at me. {shudder}

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